NO JELLY? NO JAM?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU DON'T HAVE ANY JELLY?  IF YOU'VE GOT PEANUTS AND YOU CHEW THEM UP REAL MUSHY, THEN YOU'VE GOT TO HAVE JELLY TO GO WITH IT!
WHAT DO YOU MEAN, YOU DON’T HAVE ANY JELLY? IF YOU’VE GOT PEANUTS AND YOU CHEW THEM UP REAL MUSHY, THEN YOU’VE GOT TO HAVE JELLY TO GO WITH IT!

Once in a while, I’ll come across a resident of the woods who has unusual diet demands. This character is quite the persnickety diner. I’ll put out peanuts and sunflower seeds and of course, that’s just not good enough. I’m asked why I don’t have bananas available.

I might put out a fabulous selection of fruit, and berries…but noooooo, couldn’t the kitchen please whip up some peanut butter cookies?

Another thing that is a source of contention…corn. If I put out cornbread, they would prefer corn fritters. If I put out hard shelled corn, they go on strike…they want little corn chips.

I’m to the point that I don’t care if I lose a customer…I can no longer tolerate such interference with,and manipulation of, my menu.

From now on, it’s my way or the highway……TO ALL MY FURRY AND FEATHERED FRIENDS OUT THERE…STAY AWAY FROM THE HIGHWAY!! I DIDN’T MEAN AN ACTUAL HIGHWAY!!!

WHERE DID ALL THIS SNOW COME FROM?…

Two doe (1 of 1)

We’re actually having a winter this year…lucky for me because the deer have begun to pass closer to the house. They’re smelling the alluring scent of birdseed with a side of corn. I’ve actually considered building a drive thru window onto the house…then the deer can just come up to the window, place their order and leave happy. I would definitely add a happy meal toy to their bag of sunflower seeds or whatever it is they ordered, you want to keep your customers coming back.

Hmmmmm…this would mean that I would have to wear some kind of uniform when I worked at the window…I’d need to look professional after all. I’m thinking a pink tutu and the REALLY awesome cowgirl boots I bought in Montana. I know the deer wouldn’t see that part of my uniform but I could stick my leg out the window every now and then to show them my boots.

See you all later, I’m off to cut a hole in the side of the house for the ordering window and I need to get it done before hubby gets home.