Oliver’s eye looks a little scary enlarged like this…trust me, it’s a LOT scarier when his eye starts blinking and then closes halfway. I’ve learned that this ocular behavior is a sign that I’m about to be stalked. My solution to such a situation…I start talking to Oliver as if something very exciting is about to happen. If lying to him doesn’t work, I tell him over and over in a very high voice, what a good boy he is. More lying.
While visiting my son and daughter-in-law in Montana some time back, we went to the National Bison Range. The bison were all grouped up in one small area of the range, but out of nowhere, elk would pop up.
The scary thing about some of these elk is that they walk on their tiptoes. One minute they’re not there and the next minute…surprise! Without using just their toes, how else could they sneak up so quietly? I admit, I’ve never seen them walking on tiptoe but that doesn’t mean they don’t. Just because we can’t SEE little green men walking amongst us, you wouldn’t deny their existence would you? I rest my case.
Now if you will excuse me, I need to go take my invisible dog for a walk…anybody out there have chocolate? I think I might be a quart low…
There once was a squirrel named McLarry
His legs were quite long and real hairy
I suggested he shave
But the look that he gave
Was intense and exceedingly scary!