Well, here I am at almost 1 in the morning, in a grumpy mood because I missed April fool’s day…well, I didn’t actually miss it…I was just too busy having weird things happen to really get into the day.

I was flying yesterday and it was like I was a magnet for drama.

A dazed looking woman came up to me in the airport before my flight and I asked her if she’d “lost” someone….her reply?…”I think my husband is having a heart attack.” I was off and running dragging my little, three hundred pound “carry-on” luggage behind me.
I got to call out the scariest sentence…”Is anyone here a Doctor?”…and then I found an airport employee to help her. As I got on the plane there were perhaps ten medical personnel surrounding the man in question, a gurney at the ready.

That shook me up to say the least. I got on the plane…there was a woman in the middle seat, blocking my way to my window seat. She announced that she had a medical condition and that I “would have to climb over her”. I climbed over her.

Still shaken up by the previous scary situation, my new intimate friend, the lady next to me, spoke a few words. We made a little small talk and then she burst into tears and I couldn’t understand a word she was saying. I patted her on the shoulder and told her to take deep breaths…after a while, she calmed herself. She did this at least FOUR times during the flight.

I got off the plane feeling like someone had grabbed me by the hair, twisted my whole body like a wet rag, and then kicked me in the……..posterior.

So…this image shows you how I look when the universe decides to prank me…or whatever the heck you’d call the day I just had.


          1. Weight Watchers makes ice cream too. Or do what I do…take some fruit (such as strawberries and mandarin oranges), add a cup of lowfat vanilla yogurt, toss in the blender, pour into small plastic containers and freeze. Healthy treat and sweet too.

  1. You are stuck on a plane and cannot move. It’s worse when a fat person is sitting next to you as their fat overlaps onto your seat area and they need longer seat belts.

    I once had a hospital appointment at Hairmyres Hospital in East Kilbride. In the NHS they give a load of patients the same appointment time and you usually have to wait for hours to get seen by the consultant.

    This woman sat next to me and started telling me about all her medical complaints. I couldn’t stop her going on about them. Eventually I excused myself and said I needed to go to the toilet then came back and sat in another area of the waiting room. I couldn’t listen to her any more.

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