I HAVE NO FASHION SENSE….
Well….I did it…..I spent at least an hour wandering around the outdoor supply store..intent on finding just the right cammo accessories to aid me in my attempts to capture better images of the doe and her triplets. I spent WAY too long staring at a product called….”Monkey Butt”. This is a REAL product! Apparently this baby soft powder helps to soothe the weary posteriors of hunters who sit for long periods of time. OH DRAT!!! I just realized how they came up with this name!! I’m so embarrassed…my cheeks are burning!! THE ONES ON MY FACE! THE ONES ON MY FACE!!
Let’s leave that topic “behind” shall we?, and move on with the story. I found the most fabulous cammo fabric to stretch across the bedroom door, it is a sliding glass door that looks out onto the woods..I needed more fabric to prevent them from seeing movement.
I had the fabric in my ecstatic possession, so I decided to see what else I could find to help me blend in…I strolled around a bit…and found a little girl who looked at me with giant eyes and said…” Where’s my daddy ?” Well , we went and found Daddy..( the idiot) who had left her to visit the little ladies room and he then had not stayed anywhere NEAR the restroom…he was talking on his cell phone…he looked at me and said..”she knew where I was”. He was FOUR aisles away from the restroom…I realized that I had just seen a real monkey butt up close and in person..
ANYWAY…I found an oversized men’s cammo t-shirt. I was SO excited!! I went home triumphantly clutching my purchases. I put up the cammo fabric across the door..wore the t-shirt to bed..( went to bed after hubby, so he didn’t know I was wearing it…or even that I bought it). I decided I should be prepared to spring out of bed and start capturing images if “Trace” showed up with the babies early…I think I woke up every two hours! That t-shirt was HOT!! NO…not in an ….”. I’m so attractive” kind of way….HOT as in a…. ”I think I’m having hot flashes” kind of way.
The alarm FINALLY went off…I leapt out of bed, checked the camera, put on my cammo hat…(the outfit just wouldn’t have been complete without it) and waited for the deer to arrive…I waited and I waited and I waited………….no deer. I finally gave up, made the bed…. Hubby had gone off to shower..he still hadn’t seen my fabulous attire. I decided to get back up on the bed and my little dog Max snuggled up against my legs…Our comforter is all dark and gold colors, sort of has the colors of the woods in it…Hubby walked back into the room, which was still rather dark….sigh,,,,scared hubby half to death when I spoke to him…he couldn’t tell I was there..I blended in so well, with the cammo hat and cammo t-shirt..
I think he called me a “MONKEY BUTT” !!!!!!!!! Sniff…hurt my feelings…